


In Response to "Girlfriend Wanted"

by Atelophobia_Achluophilia



Series: Original Creative Writing [8]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Actors, Girlfriend Wanted, Not Beta Read, Original work - Freeform, Other, Stand Alone, creative writing, matthew gray gubler - Freeform, this was a school assignment, writing challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2019-02-12 06:02:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12952890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atelophobia_Achluophilia/pseuds/Atelophobia_Achluophilia
Summary: My response to Matthew Gray Gubler's poem, "Girlfriend Wanted"





	In Response to "Girlfriend Wanted"

**Author's Note:**

> For those of you who don't know, MGG is the actor who plays Dc. Spencer Reid on the show Criminal Minds. I absolutely adore him and when I found his poem, I immediately knew I wanted to write a response. It always struck me as a newspaper type ad for some reason, which made me love it even more. If you wish to read the original poem, click here [here](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/390265123952139457/) and for a kiss from Mathew, click here [here](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/535083999460633005/)

In response to “Girlfriend Wanted”,

 

Of all the beginning specifications stated I am perfectly suited.

I can promise we will spend too many resources on decorating for any holiday, but most especially for Halloween and Christmas. Mischief is an ingrained part of my character, and I have no qualms about kissing in any sort of circumstance, regardless of place or time. I love wind chimes, but I must ask how you feel about sun catchers as well.

 

I am on the shorter side of average height and my weight is a little lower than I'd like, but I appreciate your open mind in regards to hair color, as mine changes frequently from naturals to neons and everything in between. I care nothing for politics but know enough to stay informed.

 

Cynics and critics are the pothole people on the road of life and I can assure you I am not among them. I must forewarn you, though I do not consider myself a pessimist I do have days when everything is dreary so I trust you will have understanding in such situations and if you continue being your usual self, the problems should sort themselves out in due time.

 

I am more voluptuous in character than figure, but I don't believe that will pose any sort of issue for either of us if you know what you're getting into.

 

I admire Mary Poppins’ philosophy and adore Elvira's air and stylish appearance, but I can say I am wholeheartedly my own person whatever resemblance I might have.

 

I can tolerate whistling although I cannot do it myself so I prefer to hum. I also burst into fits of song at the slightest remembrance of a tune. Tickle torture is fine, so long as it is not one-sided for I give as good as I get and all is fair in love and war. If you can promise me a dance, I'm sure I'll find anything you choose to play enjoyable. But if we're strictly speaking James Taylor, then putting on Blossom or You've Got a Friend is a guaranteed way to get a smile at the very least. I am neither an early bird nor a night owl, but if you cuddle me in the mornings I'll only leave the comfort of your arms when you leave the comfort of your downy. If not, there's always time for breakfast in bed and those morning butterfly kisses.

 

I'll match your limp with my twitch, your soft hands with my hardy ones, and your preternatural love of autumn with my own.

 

As for being called a “coal-eyed dandy”, it certainly does sound like a compliment so why not indulge yourself with accepting it as such?

 

I wiggle my feet in my sleep as well, have a vocabulary that would make a sailor blush, and think any Muppet movie is a good one. I am predisposed to anything Tim Burton, but most especially his claymation works.

 

You don't ask for very much, but for all you do ask I would happily give and receive.

 

A few more notes of reference about myself are as follows;

I drink an excessive amount of tea, entertain nonsensical ramblings with myself, and read like it's air.

I stammer and stutter quite regularly, play the piano (I use the term “play” very loosely), love breakfast for dinner, and adore anything by Tolkien, Lovecraft, or Poe.

I abhor gardening but love flowers. I prefer dogs to cats but only in the slightest, and I find ironic or outrageous names to be fantastic.  

 

There isn't much I can offer but I hope this response suits you well and that you would consider me as an applicant for the task.

  



End file.
